bald is beautiful

no, this post isn't about my (extremely) handsome husband, it is about my kids.  They are not bald, but their behavior makes me feel like pulling my own hair out, so soon, I may be.
Parenting is one of those things you can't explain. I can't adequately express to you the feeling of frustration that it gives me when I witness one (amazing, talented) little girl, harass and annoy another (equally as wonderful) little girl. It is especially maddening since I happen to have made them both myself. 
Since I am the adult in this particular scenario, I am also under the obligation of responding with some type of appropriate behavior. I would like to be candid and tell you, that does not usually happen.
When I think back to my childhood, I don't remember much (which I am also banking on to happen with my kids, they can just remember Christmas and Disneyland and everything else can kind of melt away into the abyss) I mostly remember big things like helicopter rides, Marine World, and the chocolate factory (NOT Willy Wonka's). But I also remember my mom being this kind of ethereal adult, that kind of floated along taking care of things, totally in control of herself and the situation.
I know this isn't actually true, because she told me as much, but that is how I remember it. (and it's still how she acts now, all clever and unaffected and champion like. It is possible that it is actually true, and she is just trying to make me feel better. That would totally be a "Mom" way to behave.)
Long story short, it was kind of a rough morning. The girls started in on each other first thing. I got involved. There was drama. (with 2 little girls, there is ALWAYS drama) I could have raised my voice (ok, yeah, that happened) and then we hustled out the door for school.  I hate starting a day this way, so I snuck cute little birdie love notes and stickers into their lunches, and when we were in the car, I apologized to them.  Layla was all strong and silent, and Maggie was smiling and quick to forgive. "It's ok Mama, I love you!"
Here I am still stewing about it, an hour later. Layla probably is too. I think it is important to take a lesson from a 6 year old and learn how to quickly forgive, and also let people know how much we love them.  Silly little disagreements shouldn't shape our days, because pretty soon days become years, and all of the years together, that is our life.
I know that some day the girls will be adults themselves, and be looking to me for answers about things like this. I will tell them that they are amazing, and how much I love them, and have them call my mom.

yay me!

Not long ago I went to a little hippie workshop, and got a lot of guilt for things I should/could be doing better around the house. Prepared food, plastic products, etc. Yeah, yeah, I freaking already know, leave me alone ok?! Well, she also told me that by choosing my $4 mocha at Starbucks, I was not only pretty much funding the Saudi oil czars, but also slash burning like 400 million square football fields of rain forest with each sip. Ouch. You know how I love me some rain forest.
I immediately came home and finished up all of my Starbucks via packets (oh, how I love thee) in the interests of the tarsier. I went and got a bag of organic french roast coffee beans out of my pantry and made the change to french pressed straight away.  This was the big change that I made after the workshop. Yay me.  I also switched to organic half and half instead of my very favorite almond joy coffee mate (that makes me happy on the inside and the outside). I am not going to lie, I wasn't happy about the creamer. Yes, I know it's made of crap and chemicals and I can't pronounce half of the ingredients. I KNOW! But it's yummy and coconutty and I love it.
After a few days of good (not great) coffee, I decided that I was going to have to make my own coffee creamer. Bold, I know. I googled a bit, and thought about it, and got to work. I would now like to share with you my amazing recipe.
Janina's organic kick ass coffee mate
(makes you happy on the inside AND the outside, and also saves your body and helps save the rain forest for the tarsiers and bonobos)
1 can organic coconut milk
1 can organic sweetened condensed milk
1/2 cup organic (Equal Exchange) drinking chocolate
1 tsp. pure almond extract
put the milks in pan, warm it up, add the chocolate, stir it up real good. When it steams, take it off the heat and stir in the almond extract.  Put it in a glass jar and keep it in the fridge.  I imagine it will be kind of like pudding when it gets all the way cooled, so be sure to have an opening where you can get at it with a spoon.
Enjoy!

Also, just so we are clear, I am never (NEVER) giving up paper towels, I love them, and they are handy. Or toilet paper. Or shampoo. (the list goes on) I do promise to do my best, and be a good steward of the earth while I am a guest here, and to only go to Starbucks when it's an emergency.
Also, I wouldn't mind a homeless, orphan, tiny, baby bonobo for Christmas. (Just in case Santa reads this)

in real life

Since the days have been darker and colder and wetter, the kids are now allowed to participate in more electronic media. They always love to play wii and watch tv, but in the spring and summer, the answer is usually no.  Now that sending them outside to play isn't always an option, the no's have slowly transitioned into yes. The girls are beyond thrilled, I have parental guilt. And on and on it goes.
This morning Layla is playing Super Mario Brothers and as usual, there is complete domination happening on screen, while Mags (her ever faithful cheerleader) is yipping and dancing in the background. I think she is the coach, since she keeps barking out instructions. "GET THE TUBE!" "DUCK!" "WATCH FOR THAT FLOWER!" I have no idea what they are doing, but listening is really fantastic, and I like how they can both participate without both of them actually playing the video game.
In a wonderful example of play imitating real life, I just overheard this discussion:
"Oh please Layla, don't kill them, they are so so cute!!"
"I don't want to kill them, but they are EVIL!"
"Just let them be....CUUUTTTEE!!"
"Listen up, they are going to kill me. They are evil, I have to get them first!"
"But. They. Are. SOOOOOOOOOOO CUTE!"
(haha, I have had this exact same conversation with Alan lots of times, although it isn't about flying frogs in video games)
Then, without a thought, she totally annihilated them all. It makes the decisions easier when there is a rule book. Unfortunately, parenting doesn't come with one, but if it did, I'm sure #1 would be DON'T KILL THE CUTE THINGS.
Sometimes, you just gotta laugh.